I am not a stranger to God.

I get back from a few days of being away, working away the otherside of the Country. I come back and log on in order to see whats going on in my ’secret space’, fluid sexuality, my blog, see if there are any responses, e-mails or new comments. I check my e-mail and then, all of a sudden, REALLY pissed off.

I had an e-mail off someone, who chose to remain anonymous but was explaining how they have read through my blog and they strongly believe that I need God. How damn rude is that!? I know that, on the one had this could be seen as a caring and compassionate gesture but on the other they have no fucking right. Just the idea that someone has been searching online looking at blogs and then finds mine and decides to e-mail me to tell me that I need God, it makes my blood boil! Or, even worse, what if they were searching the internet purposely to find us poor souls who need God and then they, arrogantly e-mail them all to tell them so.

The deal is that I am not a stranger to God, whether that is a Christian God, Buddhist or the God of the pixies who live at the bottom of my garden I am not sure but the point is that I do believe in ’something’. I have even been listening to religious songs and well, enjoying them. Every time I have listened to songs or during the times recently that I have prayed I have felt calm, I have felt like this is a part of my life, as well as my sexuality that I am figuring out. I have felt the response from whoever or whatever to be ‘It’s okay, lets take this step by step’. And I am.

I would never pull two friends together who hardly know each other and say… ‘You guys need to spend more time together’ and then basically force them to do this. If they are not compatable then they are not compatable. Friendships grow and if these two friends who hardly know each other chose to spend some time together and their relationship grows and suddenly they are best mates. Awesome. But, allow it to happen naturally.

Whoever sent me that e-mail, I doubt that you will ever come back to this blog again. The chances are you will go back to your little Christian group and explain about the horrors of the ungodly that you have seen on the internet. All I can say is that Jesus spent time with the sinners, the sluts, the whores, the murderers, the drunks, the lowest of the low. From what I read in my bible is that he never forced himself on people but HE encouraged people to come to HIM when he was ready. The alternative was that when people realised that Jesus was real, THEY shouted out to HIM. I don’t recall any account of nosey, busy body, bible bashing religious fanatics getting in the way.

So, in conclusion… FUCK OFF!